Red Alert! What Should I Do With My Devils’ Giveaway Towel?

I have this free towel, you see. I don’t know what to do with it. Will you help me?

I went to Game 2 in Newark, where they handed out these awesome towels that nobody wanted to wave. I found several of them littered around Prudential Center after the game, even though the Devils won. There was one conveniently placed in the urinal that I used before leaving the building, several littering the NJ Transit lines at Penn Station in the heart of bustling (hah) Newark, etc.

But I still have mine. I found it underneath my cat over the weekend, which might have been a solid place to keep it considering she’s getting up there in years and she likes to forget where her litter box is located. That’s no fun, though, right? It’s much more entertaining to open up suggestions to you guys, right?!

So here’s what we’re going to do, then. I’ve had a few suggestions from friends and other writers, such as: line the litter box of the aforementioned cat with it, throw it off of a bridge, donate it to a homeless man in Atlantic City, burn it in effigy, etc.

I know we can do better than that. Come up with suggestions in the comments, but keep them free of bodily fluids and make them so they can be viewed on film. Rec the ones you really like. I’ll pick the one that receives the most recs and I’ll capture the act on video. So, again: keep the suggestions decent. Make them so I’m able to put them on video here on the site.

Help me out. What will be the fate of my Devils “rally” towel?

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